let it be, let it be a song so sweet...

alright, so the other day i received a special request to do a new post, and right now it's 11:22 and i just rolled out of bed....oohhhhh so nice...and i'm feeling like a little procrastination before i hit those books. i don't even know if y'all read these things, i think we've all been slackin off a little bit (ren, sam...ahem) but whatever. you all know i can talk and talk and talk to absolutely no one and that's cool. anyway, so i'm thinking i choose to be happy. and the reason why i'm thinking this is because i'm taking existentialism this semester, and it's my only class on thursdays, not until 2:40, which is why i have time to sleep in til 11...ooohhh so nice. and the reason why i'm thinking that is because on tuesdays and thursdays i go to that class, and it's usually such a beautiful day like today--it's usually such a beautiful day here--and i sit in class for an hour and 20 minutes and wish i could more subtly look out the window at the beautiful sky and the beautiful trees and the beautiful air but since i think my professor would probably notice after 5 minutes or so, i usually end up turning away from the window and staring into my notes or up at the blackboard or whatever. and we sit and we talk about the most depressed guys...i mean, really depressed guys...who have absolutely no hope, and think that ever since the industrial revolution the world just sucks and we can't go back to some golden age of meaning, and i'm kinda wondering if they're not just completely romanticizing the past and just kinda wallowing in their completely unproductive self-pity...and hey, maybe these dudes deserve a little more respect and i'm just not catching on. but i always come out of there thinking, i don't understand. i don't understand how you could make yourself so miserable for absolutely no reason but a made up reason (and i'm sure every last one of you is laughing at me right now, if you know me at all, because i am, i admit, somewhat the quintessential existentialist--always making up my own drama and then wallowing in it--but c'mon, that's only at certain times of the day). and at the end of it all, i honestly just get bored. self-pity gets really boring really quickly. not to mention the fact that i have nothing to pity myself about. i don't want to discount anyone's feelings but my own, for it's certainly not my place to judge. i just look at these guys, these really intelligent, wealthy, resourceful writer guys, and i just want to run out of Ascension and go play and laugh and be happy. cause i am priveledged enough to have that choice. not everyone is, but i, by a power much greater than i can imagine, somehow am. and what glory would i be bringing to my Father by just being a wallower? so that's all i'm saying. i have a choice, and i choose happiness. isn't that great? i have a choice. and it's all so beautiful, how could i stand to waste it? and i mean, camping's great, but it's also nice to get out of that tent once in a while and just soak up the simplicity. i thought it was a witty touch ;-). y'all have a lovely day.