before i was born, every day recorded...

even yesterday. thank you so much to everyone who sent me such lovely birthday blessings, whether that be in the form of cards, xanga posts, emails, powerpoints, or facebook messages. i have always felt overwhelmingly rich in friendship; i am forever amazed at God's bountiful blessings on me.

june 22 started out just fine. i shocked 'em all by showing up at breakfast and then, after rescuing my car from the tree branches falling out of the sky, ventured off for one last go at head start. as usual i walked in and all the kids immediately swarmed around me and i'm not sure if i felt or imagined looks of irritation from the teachers...but hey, i really feel like if you're ever having a bad day, one of the best things to do for yourself is to go play with some kids. they run up to you and want to know everything about you and fight over who gets to hold your hand and sit in your lap first--these are the people we are called to be. i helped noah with his puzzle, paige showed me her haircut, autumn wrapped her arms around my neck from behind--and then it was time to go outside. we discovered a gross but curious looking fungus growing on the mulch, and i did my best to fairly distribute the water and clean up the dixie cups that were thrown everywhere. at lunch i sat with three lovely girls--cierra, lizzie, and tory--and they shared their ingenius idea of applesauce and pita bread with me. when i was about to leave cierra dubbed me with a 'dora the explorer' sticker and went on to her sloppy joe. it's incredible. these kids give you all the love they have and then let you go without a fuss--whether it's been returned to them or not. i've got a lot to learn.

i returned to gambier and jo and i headed to gund to get some lunch. it was getting late and there was no sign of mick or audrey, so we started to wonder. finally i found them upstairs, coming across mick in a not-so-smiley mood. the driven dudes were working him to death and i felt awful because i didn't know how to help until he told me. i guess fred ordered him to take a break and get some food, so we all met downstairs and regrouped and were then sent on our way to divide and conquer. aud and i did a fine job of delivering several heavy appliances, despite the sticky heat, and then of course a stop at the market before it was time for me to go get ready for dinner with the grandparents.

as i got in my car to go to jake's, i noticed the yellow sky and the violent wind and i thought, well, if i had it my way i would not be driving right now, but if i don't leave now i'll be late and they'll be mad. so i drove cautiously down 308 as tree branches flew across the road and my bug took a bit of a beating. eventually it started to pour and when i reached the light at coshocton and upper gilchrist i realized that all the power was out--all the buildings, all the traffic lights, everything. still, i drove down the road to jake's, hoping i wouldn't miss it, and when i got to the parking lot i sat in my car, debating about whether i should get out and get soaked or wait a few minutes and let it calm down--still worried that i would be late. when i finally got out and went in one of the servers apologized, 'our power's out so we're not seating anyone right now.' i asked if i could come in anyway and spent the next 45 minutes in the doorway of jake's trying to get in touch with grandma and grandpa. cell phones weren't working and everyone was in a panic of course. it ended up that they had taken a long way to town because all the roads were closed as a result of the many fallen trees. i had to tell them that there was no way we could eat anywhere in town because of the power outage and so they ended up going home.

so i headed back to gambier, hungry and eager to see what was going on there. it ended up that everyone was hanging out outside since there was no air conditioning; there was food provided by the resilient avi, and long lines to go with it; and charlotte's mime performance had been cancelled once again. after audrey enlightened me that "BOTH of your birthday dinners are destroyed" we went over to big house to play some cards and bide our time. of course aud and i took a beating to mick and jo, but you know, aud figured out how to pop kettle corn over the gas stove, so that was exciting.

by 8:30 i was feeling exhausted (and i have to admit, a little depressed) from the adventure of a birthday and really just wanted to go to sleep, but the girls insisted that i come to driven's first session so they pulled me up out of the big blue chair and we were on our way.

i am so glad they did that. it's the best thing they could have given me. in the dark in gund ballroom we sang the familiar worship songs and i started to come back to my senses and to feel my strength and my smallness at once and remember that it is good. it is well with my soul. the speaker said some decent things and i felt warmed and happy.

when we got back to the pitch dark house i proposed that we have a slumber party (because i'm scared of the dark) so we used my cell phone and audrey's pen flashlight to light the way as we brushed our teeth and dragged our mattresses into jo's room. to top it all off, as we were getting settled we heard the door creak open and jaimie was home! she shared some stories from georgia and then i couldn't keep my eyes open any longer.

so...i won't be forgetting my 20th.

and tonight...either peter pan or buca di beppo (both would be amazing but we'll see)!!

it's time that will tell if it's heaven, if it's hell...

Cars is so cute--everyone should go see it. Thanks again Mick.

and to you all--thank you for keeping me moving. i am blessed.

try not to throw all your money into 20/20 vision...

well, it's been interesting. i climbed into the minivan through the driver's seat window while mick was driving yesterday after lunch. they locked me out of the car (who knows why) and there was no other way for me to get in. it was pretty hilarious.

last night we played an ugly game of croquet (green is not always lucky). oh well, it could have been worse. i suppose i could have broken mick's foot or something. euchre was even uglier; complete with the hauntingly ironic john tesch (sp?) soundtrack to my life, i was feelin' pretty pumped.

but audrey and i won today.

thanks again to all my share-bears; i am so grateful to God for the blessing of your friendship.

and it's only wednesday. but if you don't have the horses, you can't ride.

it's only life after all...

a good day with papa share-bear, my FAVORITE cupholder (share-bear), and the girls. jo has a lovely home. and my face is longer than audrey's.

is that your motto?

i will dream of you til the day i die...

or maybe it was 'i'll be dreaming of you til the day i die.' i promised myself i would remember and i don't remember. oh well. it's still pretty funny.

at this point in the evening i'm no longer really thinking in words. audrey says it well:
"this morning was a very long time ago"

mick climbed out of the window of the mini-van at midnight and the guy's name was carl. he said i was in a picture in storer but i know i'm not. at least i wasn't imagining things again. jo's laugh is so adorable and she's right on the radar even when i'm not. audrey secretly likes to get hot 'n ready. and if carl really likes me, he won't be carin' what i'm wearin'.

i hid behind mick's couch tonight and he actually thought i left. i was so proud. but then i couldn't keep from laughing so he found me. liam called somewhere in there.

mick sang 'stand by me' to me over the phone tonight and we all almost fell on the floor laughing. there were others but that one i remember the best. i swear i didn't ditch him. ditching is intentional. what do you think? let me know, i'd love to know.

he pulled the chair out from under me and i fell down. my face hurts from laughing so hard.
we sang summer sunshine.

and then we watched as five drunk barbershoppers carried the kegs away. the golf cart helped. they were going to finish them off once they got to caples.

it's a good thing i didn't have any. it already feels like an alternate universe.

i feel like i can still hear them singing. i guess they just never stop.

i love you guys so much. good night.

when you snap your finger, or wink your eye, i come runnin' to you...

i just wanted to say that i love mick's analogies. i love them. memory and yeast. security and yippy dogs. God's plan and road maps (apparently Liam always laughs at that one...i laugh at them all because i am impressed and they're hilarious).

ohh security. mick says they're like yippy dogs that jump all over you and just kind of annoy you, and it's not that you're mad, but you just wonder why.

and denny calls him mickey. in total seriousness. i hope that's not my fault. i love it.

apparently the lights are flickering all over campus...they're starting to yip again and wondering why in the world 23 isn't here on a saturday morning.

but this is just the beginning, we're already wet and we're gonna go swimming...

it's a fact that we're gonna get down to it, so tell me." Kinda scary when a week into the summer I'm already quoting cheesy/kinda dirty love songs. Don't wonder about that, it's not worth it.

So summer. Gambier. Loving it--would you expect anything less? And you know, I'm not doing too bad of a job. Despite what Fred thinks. I'm on the night shift for goodness sake--it's not like I'm intentionally lazy. I mean, not most of the time.

So I've been reading The Irresistible Revolution and moving pretty slow at it for some not-quite-fathomable reason. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that while Mr. Shane Claiborne's coolness is undeniable, and his message well worth listening to--and I've been dreaming all year of picking it right up--I am still afraid. Terrified of really life. Gambier is cozy and comfortable and allows me to daydream about the PeaceCorps as much as I like without getting any mud on my face.

I guess that's what the next two years are for. No doubt I'll be so sick of it by then I'll be dying to get out and into the world...I mean, that's always how it's been before.

So why do I still doubt? Cozy and comfortable and friends who know me so well I can't hide a thing...................